25 Lines About 25 Days*

I feel like I am Grover, and there is a monster at the end of this book. I look at the lilypie ticker at the bottom of my site and, flailing arms, yell, ‘WHAT DOES THAT SAY?! DOES THAT SAY THAT THERE IS A BABY DUE IN 25 DAYS?!’

Now, really, I look more like Gonzo and I act more like Oscar, but humour me. And I won’t beg anybody not to turn the page, as I really am excitedly anticipating what’s coming at the end, but y’know, it would be ok if things just slowed down a bit. I’d be ok if we weren’t turning the pages quite so quickly. And it’s not because I’m scared – I’m totally not. Bee was born after 4 hours of (the hard part of) labour, and I expect this child to be even more efficient. My midwife is already joking that she’s just moving in November 1 so that she won’t miss it. So no, not scared.

The thing is, I have a lot of shit to do before Soon-to-Bee arrives. A lot. And I don’t get much done on any given day. In fact, just getting through the regularly scheduled, minimum-effort required day is a huge accomplishment. And so far, no freaking nesting instinct, which would help greatly.

By this point in my pregnancy with Bee, I was staying up until 4am to magic erase my entire kitchen floor. This time, not so much. Although I have been baking a lot of muffins.

Anyway, the point is, I need to get organized. 25 days, people; 25 days.

I have decided to create a to-do list, prioritizing only the most important tasks**. Many other tasks, like cleaning the bathroom, have been left off the list because I just don’t care to do them. Someone else can. Or not. Don’t care. So here’s my list; if I can do one task each day, awesome. If not, well, baby’s coming no matter what. Eventually we will get to the end of the book.

Kgirl’s pre-baby 25 things to-do in 25 days list:

1. Sort out baby clothes
2. Wash baby clothes
3. Put baby clothes in dresser
4. Move dresser upstairs
5. Assemble co-sleeper
6. Put together remainder of homebirth kit
7. Put together just-in-case hospital bag
8. Wrap Bee’s ‘From Your Baby Sister’ present
9. Wash my hair
10. Drop off Bee’s nursery school enrollment forms
11. Get after-birth necessities (arnica, food, slingshot for pelting guests that stay too long)
12. Spend 10 minutes alone with my husband
13. Have sex with my husband
14. Decide on a name for child in the remaining 5 minutes
15. Sell old strollers on craigslist to make room for snazzy new stroller
16. Wax the beav
17. Clean baby carseat
18. Plant memorial rosebush that has been sitting in pot in garden since my dad died
19. Get Halloween pumpkin
20. Turn pumpkin into jackolantern
21. Toast pumpkin seeds for healthy, zinc-filled snack
22. Make labour-ade; freeze half
23. Freeze grapes (I ate a lot of frozen grapes while in labour with Bee)
24. Wash my hair
25. Give birth

...And you were so scared.

*Points if you guess this reference and think that it is as obvious and not really clever as I do

**Sleep would normally take up all 25 lines on this list, but I have given up on sleep. It’s not gonna happen, and I accept that. But if this post is rambly and disjointed, you know why.



  1. Don't you think that washing your hair twice is a bit excessive?

  2. oh my goodness you just made me think...wait a minute how many days do i have.... quickly refering to my google.baby-gaga.com ticker.... I have 28 days... not much less, i think i also will right up a panic to- do list

  3. whoa, girl. you know, (and don't kick me) it's gone by really fast, hasn't it...

    a soon to be baby bee.

  4. You know, I wasn't in a hurry at the end of my time growing Pumpkinpie, either. It just seemed like, well, I could have used more vacation time or something. To get ready. Stock up on sleep. and so on.

    But my dear, you ARE just as lovable as Grover! (and, if you get to #16, less furry.)

  5. I spent the last of my days of pregancy sorting, washing and putting away all the super cute baby clothes I received at my shower. Mad time go by a little faster!

  6. Oh that damn animal desire to nest and do all this stuff......

    the 25 lines thing. A movie?

    and waxing the beav? ew. good luck. ouch.

  7. That was MY FAVORITE BOOK IN THE WORLD when I was a kid. The suspense!
    Don't do what I did 21 days before The Baby was due - I gave birth! (she was completely fine. And BIG.)

  8. Hey, your snazzy new stroller is exactly the one that we're going to go out and buy next weekend! What colour did you get? I think we're going with orange - cause why not? I like orange.

    I am avoiding making a to-do list because I have so much to do.

    I want to do some waxing too, but I'm afraid that the shock and pain will make me spontaneously go into labour. It also may get me some good lovin' from the man.

  9. 88 Lines about 44 Women? Nine Inch Nails?

    Did I get it, did I get it? Or did I just reveal wayyy to much about myself.

    And I that stroller is a beaut!

  10. "wash my hair" "give birth" - funny. I'm a to-do list maker too. You're a girl after my own heart. Take care.

  11. Wow, I forgot how soon you're due! Good luck with your to-do list. I had one, too, but as we got close to my due date, and exhaustion set in, I said to hell with half the list. Oops - I'm a good list maker. but a lousy list doer.

  12. The second one is sooooo much easier and if I can say that of mine yours will be pure bliss.

    I think with the second you know that you don't have to get through the list before it comes. Though putting two hair washes on the list shows me you have your priorities straight. Gotta get your 'me' time.

    I almost finished putting Julia's clothes in her dresser yesterday. This morning I took our degrees off the wall. Sometimes I feel sorry for her but then I think that's what she gets for trying to kill me.

  13. sarah hijacked my computer.
    Lisa b

  14. what is in Labour-ade? Why do you need to wax the beav?

    So much to learn...

  15. wax the beav.


    and i thought i was the only one in the world who magic erased her kitchen floor!

  16. Hey, as long as you get the grapes frozen, the beav waxed and the sex had, all else will fall into place.

    I'm so excited for ya.

    Good luck.

    You could always name the bee to be after me...Earlene...works for a boy or a girl...strong and sexy.


  17. babbler - ding ding ding! 88 lines about 44 women - for the record, Karen was a Catholic girl, heh heh.

    Nomo - the inlaws are picking up the stroller in the states, so I'm afraid the colour is left up to them. I'm partial to the green or orange.

  18. That is the BEST stroller ever. We have the orange one, and get comments wherever we go. It's GREAT.

    I can't believe you're almost there. Wow.


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