I feel like I am Grover, and there is a monster at the end of this book. I look at the lilypie ticker at the bottom of my site and, flailing arms, yell, ‘WHAT DOES THAT SAY?! DOES THAT SAY THAT THERE IS A BABY DUE IN 25 DAYS?!’
Now, really, I look more like Gonzo and I act more like Oscar, but humour me. And I won’t beg anybody not to turn the page, as I really am excitedly anticipating what’s coming at the end, but y’know, it would be ok if things just slowed down a bit. I’d be ok if we weren’t turning the pages quite so quickly. And it’s not because I’m scared – I’m totally not. Bee was born after 4 hours of (the hard part of) labour, and I expect this child to be even more efficient. My midwife is already joking that she’s just moving in November 1 so that she won’t miss it. So no, not scared.
The thing is, I have a lot of shit to do before Soon-to-Bee arrives. A lot. And I don’t get much done on any given day. In fact, just getting through the regularly scheduled, minimum-effort required day is a huge accomplishment. And so far, no freaking nesting instinct, which would help greatly.
By this point in my pregnancy with Bee, I was staying up until 4am to magic erase my entire kitchen floor. This time, not so much. Although I have been baking a lot of muffins.
Anyway, the point is, I need to get organized. 25 days, people; 25 days.
I have decided to create a to-do list, prioritizing only the most important tasks**. Many other tasks, like cleaning the bathroom, have been left off the list because I just don’t care to do them. Someone else can. Or not. Don’t care. So here’s my list; if I can do one task each day, awesome. If not, well, baby’s coming no matter what. Eventually we will get to the end of the book.
Kgirl’s pre-baby 25 things to-do in 25 days list:
1. Sort out baby clothes
2. Wash baby clothes
3. Put baby clothes in dresser
4. Move dresser upstairs
5. Assemble co-sleeper
6. Put together remainder of homebirth kit
7. Put together just-in-case hospital bag
8. Wrap Bee’s ‘From Your Baby Sister’ present
9. Wash my hair
10. Drop off Bee’s nursery school enrollment forms
11. Get after-birth necessities (arnica, food, slingshot for pelting guests that stay too long)
12. Spend 10 minutes alone with my husband
13. Have sex with my husband
14. Decide on a name for child in the remaining 5 minutes
15. Sell old strollers on craigslist to make room for snazzy new stroller
16. Wax the beav
17. Clean baby carseat
18. Plant memorial rosebush that has been sitting in pot in garden since my dad died
19. Get Halloween pumpkin
20. Turn pumpkin into jackolantern
21. Toast pumpkin seeds for healthy, zinc-filled snack
22. Make labour-ade; freeze half
23. Freeze grapes (I ate a lot of frozen grapes while in labour with Bee)
24. Wash my hair
25. Give birth
...And you were so scared.
*Points if you guess this reference and think that it is as obvious and not really clever as I do
**Sleep would normally take up all 25 lines on this list, but I have given up on sleep. It’s not gonna happen, and I accept that. But if this post is rambly and disjointed, you know why.