It’s not usually like this.I’m totally exhausted. Emotionally drained, my limbs feel heavy and my heart feels grey. One more argument with my husband; one more insensitive remark from a coworker; one more sleepless night or one more worrying turn to my mother’s health – I’m ready for it; expecting it.
I’m not even steeling myself for these inevitables, as impact, deflection hurt, leaves ugly marks; I’m softening to the blows; sinking into them, crumpling around them.
I have no time; I have no energy. The daily grind is pulverizing me; things I consider important are getting left by the wayside, getting laid to waste.
My husband and I are still partners – sparring partners. Will a new year bring a renewed connection, or simply new distance?
I need balance. The scales seem to be tipping. Towards what, I’m not sure.
p.s. the first person to suggest depression or pms gets a virtual punch in the face.